Here is a category I am in: I don't really enjoy dancing if there is no conversation. By that I mean - both people expressing themselves.
For this to happen, the leader has to allow it - invite it. If he dances always doing what he wants without giving the woman space and time to decide little things for herself sometimes, the conversation cannot take place on a meaningful level of interaction.
Perhaps by my saying this you can tell I feel felicitously spoiled by living in a city with many, many wonderful dancers who also enjoy this conversational style of dancing. So spoiled by that enjoyment that anything else is to me sort of going through the motions - which I have always avoided doing. Once you are in the habit of letting yourself be surprised by what your partner initiates, you feel THAT is true tango and you want it that way all the time. Well, I do.
I encourage all men to seek ways of giving over the direction at appropraite moments for your partner to do as she pleases with you. It takes the experience to a whole new level.
And yes - it can be taught. One shows the man where in a song to get in a position that invites; and then the most important thing - how to wait. I have always thought "waiting" is a big part of tango. The many hesitations of the dance become invitational waiting when extended another instant.
One shows women how to respond to the leader waiting and inviting. How to tease with an embellishment or where to step to initiate another movement NOT chosen by the man. And then of course how to be in-tune to surrender to his guidance right away again so the dance continues in harmony with the music in the normal way.
If you do this already, you know what I'm talking about when I say it makes the tango experience much richer and seem like that was the original intention of it all along.
If you are going to go about incorporating it into your way, beware! Soon you will be more discriminating in who you choose to dance with because you will want the conversation all the time with everybody. And sadly, people hip to the conversation sparkle are in the minority at the present time.
A beautiful anguish.
